Previous Facebook post from February 13, 2021.
Long post warning. TL;DR -- answer to the question of why some people can hear the dead and others can't. For the same reasons, some people find math easier than writing essays, some people love swimming over football, some people see a lot of colors, and some see very few.
I experienced two head injuries during the same time frame I started perceiving the Dead. I started hearing them loudly at 18 years old but have no idea if those head injuries were some sort of triggering event or not.
My first memory of the dead is of my cousins goofing around with a Ouija board. I was between first and second grade, so coming up on seven years old-ish. It was dark in the room and outside. I wasn't sure what they were doing, but I loved them so much I would've sat there no matter what they were up to. I remember my Uncle walking through the kitchen at some point and them saying how he could pick up thoughts. If you wanted to keep a secret, you had to sing a song like Mary Had a Little Lamb over and over in your head, lol.
My mother had books of all kinds in the house, and I read a ton of them, but mostly I was scared of the dead and really wanted nothing to do with them. I remember the adults telling a ton of ghost stories, and I hated those tales so much!
My next memory was being nearly 9, I think, and living in an old house. The previous owner had been a doctor, and my bedroom was his old waiting area. One night I saw shadows on the wall like silhouettes, and people were talking and chattering. It felt like a party going on, and it terrified me! I remember my mom telling me it was a dream or that if it was "ghosts," I could tell them to go away.
There were plenty of times I knew there was someone nearby or saw an animal streak by out of the corner of my eye. It was just a thing that happened. I didn't seek to know about them, and I was pretty annoyed most of the time when I did have awareness of the energies around me.
I'm a Scorpio who should've been fascinated, but I have a strong Capricorn influence, so I wanted nothing more than straight A's, preppy clothes, and a "normal" life HA! Talk about pushmepullyou!
Basically, this was an in-the-background sub-current kind of experience for me until I started working as an Emergency Medical Technician.
The very first day I was confronted with death, death, and more death. My company had the "body contract" with the county. If the funeral homes were busy, we were sent to pick up and deliver bodies to the morgue at the county medical examiner's office.
I'll give more details in the book I'm writing, but that first shift of death was like this -
a security guard hit by a speeding car while changing a tire on the side of a major freeway - I felt him standing there regretting his decision to stop and help that driver.
A massive car wreck caused a person to be trapped in their car and burned - this person was completely confused and was afraid to leave the smoking car.
A woman who fell asleep smoking on the couch and burned the house down - this woman was deeply upset at her mistake causing the death of all her cats - this upset me deeply as well as I was stepping on skeletons.
An infant had to be retrieved from the hospital. I was taught to carry dead children out in my arms disguised as a pile of rumpled laundry because we didn't know if any family were still in the area, and no one wanted to see a tiny body on a giant stretcher anyway.
Shock, shock, shock, shock.
Our shifts were 24 hours long, and we never slept all night.
I went home, and I remember washing my hair and gagging on the smoke smell that was held within the strands. The oily smoke stink from the car, and the acrid wood and burned hair stink from the house.
I didn't cry. I couldn't eat. I finished my shower and went to bed. I shut out the dead because I didn't know what to do.
I didn't know why they were there because 24 hours before, I still thought death was like the movies - the bad thing happens and lights out - done.
That's not how it goes AT ALL.
Even a peaceful death needs time to transition - to unwind cell by cell from the physical. A traumatic or violent, or unexpected death can leave many spinning in confusion and fear.
This went on for months before I asked for help with it. I'll tell you more as time goes on and I keep posting here. This is a part of my book, which will be coming next year…I think!
XO,
LMW