The Human Design Projector Paradox
Y'all need to run down to the Boundaries Store and treat yo'self to a few
Do we need more rest, or do we need more boundaries? If you’re resting but not restoring, you might need to establish some better boundaries and exercise saying a Sacred No!
The Orchestrator - Projector [and those who have projected gates and channels] paradox is we need, Invitation, Recognition, and Attention to thrive. However, when it does show up, our system may freak out about it for various reasons such as a Happiness Threshold that’s too low, being conditioned to say Yes every time someone wants something from you, being afraid if you turn down an invitation it may be 84 years before you get another one!
Most of these signs of progress are short-circuited by shitty boundaries.
So this pattern happens:
📣 We say something out of our ability to see deeply
👂👀 It resonates with people, and they turn toward us for more
🧱 If we have crap boundaries, we try to meet the demands for more or feel bad if we say no or are afraid to say no (common among women who fear men’s wrath when told no), or we act from the “make hay while the sun shines” perspective pushing ourselves into performance exhaustion
🛌 We don't rest-play because, Hallelujah, Jesus the Recognition is raining down on our parched and starving souls
🥱😩 We get tired and put on our cranky pants, and if we keep pushing onward...
🧥 The Invisibility Cloak of Bitterness activates [to save our lives]
😥 People disappear, and we have just reinforced our stories that no one listens to us/hears us/pays attention to us 🙄🤪
Aye-uh, what a conundrum!
If this is your pattern, consider...
Can you let people go if they don't want to wait for your energy to come back up and respond to them?
Are you willing to recognize and pay attention to yourself and the need to rest and play?
Is it their responsibility to stop asking, or is it your responsibility to set limits on your availability?
Is it possible to trust that when you protect your precious energy, the right people will show up at the right time to really benefit from your insights?
Is it possible to see all the questions as the physical manifestations of Recognition and simply answer as you're able to?
Are we allowing other people the freedom to feel however they want to feel in response to us taking our rest time, or are we draining ourselves to make sure they feel the way we think they "should" feel?
Is the latter sorta kinda controlling? Manipulative even?
In other words, people are allowed to respond to us however they want to—their disappointment/reactions, whatever they are, is not our business.
A critical turning point, and one I repeatedly return to, is boundaries. Which means I have to be comfortable with discomfort sometimes.
When the system works, you find that the people who stick around are the ones ready to exchange with you in healthy ways. You discover that when you turn down not-right invites, a handful of really right invites can come through.
When you say no when you need to, set boundaries, and protect your precious energy, everyone thrives!
XO,
LMW
P.S. You can book a Human Design session with me HERE