The following is a summary of a podcast transcript, which, thankfully, ChatGPT pretty much wrote for me from the word-for-word version. You can listen to this episode at the bottom of this post if you prefer.
Welcome to the Sovereign Storytellers podcast, where we delve into the depths of personal growth and self-discovery. I'm Michelle Wolff, your host, and today's episode, "It's Not You, It's Them," stems from a recent mediumship gallery reading that left me with profound insights I can't wait to share.
Before we dive in, let me introduce you to Melissa Pharr, a gifted medium whose revelations sparked the inspiration for this discussion. As a fellow medium, attending these gatherings has always been a source of connection and enlightenment for me. However, Melissa's ability to channel detailed messages from my deceased loved ones, including my father, Joe, and childhood father figure, Daddy George, took me by surprise.
Reflecting on these messages, I realized they carried more weight than I initially grasped. My father's words echoed themes of struggle and a scarcity mindset, beliefs I unwittingly absorbed and allowed to color my approach to life and business. His message was clear: I have been carrying his burdens, and it’s negatively influencing my business. He was answering a question I’ve been asking, and it’s time to release them.
This experience prompted me to ponder the deeper implications of our interactions with others, especially in healing professions like mine. As healers, helpers, and guides, we're driven by an innate desire to alleviate suffering and facilitate growth. Yet, in our noble pursuit, we often encounter resistance and frustration.
What I've come to understand is that the efficacy of our healing work isn't solely determined by our skills or intentions. It's equally influenced by the receptivity and readiness of those we seek to assist. This realization sheds light on the concept of hidden agendas—unconscious motivations that underlie our interactions and shape our outcomes. The podcast I reference about therapists/healers is here.
Many of us enter the healing realm with altruistic intentions, hoping to make a positive impact on others' lives. Yet, beneath this noble exterior lies a complex web of desires and expectations, including the subconscious belief that our worth is tied to our ability to heal others.
This phenomenon isn't unique to therapists or mediums; it permeates various helping professions and interpersonal relationships. We're often drawn to individuals who mirror unresolved issues from our past, hoping to heal ourselves vicariously through them. However, this well-intentioned impulse can lead to codependency and burnout when our efforts fail to yield the desired results.
Recognizing these dynamics is the first step toward cultivating healthier, more sustainable healing practices. Instead of fixating on external validation or striving to rescue others, we must shift our focus inward, aligning with our true purpose and allowing our authentic selves to shine through.
We can attract genuinely receptive clients to our support and guidance by embracing our intuitive gifts, honoring our boundaries, and allowing for communication with our wise ancestors.
Rather than engaging in futile rescue missions, we can empower individuals to take ownership of their healing journey and facilitate lasting transformation.
In essence, it's not about abandoning our role as healers or helpers; it's about discerning where and how we can best channel our energy for maximum impact. When we relinquish the need to control outcomes and surrender to the flow of universal wisdom, miracles unfold, and healing becomes a collaborative dance rather than a solitary struggle.
The “work” difference between aligned clients, not aligned clients, and having or not having clarity within yourself about personal motivations is profound. When everything is stacked up properly, I never feel bone-deep tired and never fear burning out. I also do MUCH better financially!
So, if you find yourself feeling drained or disillusioned in your healing work, take a moment to examine the hidden agendas at play. Are you seeking validation or trying to fix others to heal your own heart? To finally resolve those original wounds and feel whole? Are you aligning with clients who are genuinely ready to receive your guidance? Are you holding a clear space or feeling like you “have” to get results because you’ve been paid?
By bringing awareness to these unconscious patterns, we liberate ourselves from self-imposed limitations, wasting time pursuing the wrong clients for the wrong reasons, and step into our power as catalysts for positive change.
Remember, true healing begins within, and by honoring our authentic selves, we can create ripple effects of transformation that extend far beyond our individual spheres of influence.
Thank you for joining me on this journey of self-discovery and reflection. Until next time, embrace your innate gifts, trust in the wisdom of the universe, and, above all, remember to listen to the whispers of your soul. Signing off for now, remember to think less, feel more, and embrace the magic of your own sovereign story.
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Michelle this has been one of my favorite episodes. So much food for thought here. I made notes! I did the Wealth meditation last night and surprise surprise my ancestors came up with some stuff I needed to clear. And it's precisely this: what have I been unconsciously loyal to? Phew a whole packet of reasons to hide and stay poor to be safe my ancestors experienced. When I do energetic work w my ancestors I always honour them for their journey if immense suffering and thank them for my life. And then I tell them what belongs to them and not to me, and that I'm leaving it with them. Always such a visceral shift in the field when I hit on the right thing. I loved the story re your dad. Our ancestors have so many gifts for us.